Knowing When to Run

Momma looks happy.

Hollywood had the play of the game but it was called back on a completely bogus penalty.  He had his first TAINT, intercepting the ball at the 38 yard line and running it back for the score.  The refs called pass interference on the Soph, even though it was absolutely clear that #1, the Jag initiated contact #2, Cameron didn't even put his hands on the receiver and #3, the "interference" had nothing to do with the play - the ball was severely underthrown and the receiver never had a shot at the ball.  Just ridiculous.  Anyway, Nick ran for score on 4th down and, overall, started to figure out when to run it and when to throw it.  I'm getting giddy at how good this team is going to be.

Going Hollywood

Quick - guess which one is the starting quarterback?  Now guess which one is the backup quarterback?

Let's do this right here, right now.  Lefty was a dumb nickname.  My bad.  If I'm changing the Swiss Army Knife to something else, it has to be better than Lefty.  So Nick is going Hollywood.  I mean, seriously.  Have you seen this kid?  So, between that and his two interviews with Good Morning America, one as Class President, the other as quarterback, he's definitely Hollywood.

Toying With Them

Take one look at that pic above.  Then you'll know why this joke will never get old.

Now that was the game we were expecting.  8/13 for 181 and a TD.  Lefty added two more rushing TDs for good measure.  Nothing more to say here.  Let's move along.

Still Doing It All

That's how it should look.

They say the first time is always the hardest.  I think Lefty will back me up when I say that he looked a little tentative out there at times, mostly when he was trying to decide whether to run or create more time for his receivers to get open.  Statistically, it'll be his worst game of the year - 3 INTs does not a healthy stat sheet make.  But one ball was picked because he was smacked from his blindside by an unblocked OLB as he threw, the second one was tipped, and the third one... well, he was told to throw to a receiver that couldn't possibly be open, so he did, and was rightly picked off.  But he ran for about 60 yards and a TD on 7 carries (though I believe the 7 sacks he took will diminish those numbers) and had 11 completions for around 110 yards.  Not bad.  Oh, and he punted and played CB too.  Of course.

Here Come The Ships

The cougars tell me they aren't just accomplished football players - they're also pretty cute.

Welcome back!  It's been far, far too long.  If you're new to the blog this year, I encourage you to read the initial post to get a sense of why I started doing this.  In fact, this blog was started for just two and a half people, and their parents.  10,000 page views later, it's become something else.  The popularity of the blog, combined with my new role this year, will likely change how I approach my posts this year.  But I will try and stay true to the two things that made the blog such a success last year: a celebration of the Lincoln Ships Football Team and the necessary snark to keep everyone entertained and humble.

After the jump is the only 2012 Lincoln Ships Football Preview you'll ever need to read (with apologies to the HTR).  Let's go Ships!  #ShipsPride

He'll Need a New Nickname

Dear First-Team, All-Dreamboat, Ships' utility player,

First things first: you can start focusing on just one position now.  Well, who knows, I suppose.  But I don't think you'll be playing QB, RB, WR, CB, holder, and playing on the kick return unit next year.  But, who knows?  For now, though, the focus will be on improving your arm strength (no, not bicep curls), accuracy, agility, speed, and making sure your threads are tight, yo.  While it was exciting watching you do your thang anytime you got in the game this season, it'll be nuts seeing you touch the ball on every offensive play next year.

We also want you to be a leader with Austin - go read the last Austin post for the specifics.  Basically, you have some big First-Team All-FRCC shoes to fill.  It'll take hard work to fill them.  Go play basketball, but when you're done, take a day week off and then join Austin and his posse in the weight room, speed and agility training, and recruiting new talent.  In addition, find any and everyone you might be throwing passes to next year and get together once, if not twice, a week and play catch.  Tanner and Pistol didn't just do what they did without practice.  The more time you spend practicing with your receivers, the more you'll understand where they'll be, where they like the ball, and when you can trust them to make a catch.  That'll lead to success on the field.  I was a defensive back, but every week, usually 3 or 4 times a week after basketball was over, our quarterback, top two wide receivers, running back, a linebacker, and four defensive backs played a smaller version of 7 on 7 in the fieldhouse after school, usually for 45 minutes to an hour, before we lifted.  We all got better for it, and took it outside when the weather got better.  You don't have to do that.  But if you can, you should.  Plus, it's a ton of fun.

Thanks again for a special season.  Thanks for those two HB option passes that were dead-on.  Thanks for the rushing touchdowns.  Thanks for plowing forward on 4th down for a 1st down during the now-famous final drive of the Homecoming game.  Thanks for playing defense in a playoff game.  But, most of all, thanks for taking my crap all year.  I kid because I care.  Here's some pretty pictures for your trouble...

No Rest for the Wicked

They don't want to slap your hand, Nick.

That was pretty cool.  Nick made his debut as a defensive back laying the kind of wood that the Mayor would have been proud of.  Later, in a classy move by Coach D, the Swiss Army Knife played the entire second half at quarterback... all while playing defensive back, too.  The Swiss Army Knife goes both ways now?

Adding a New Position?

Does this even need a caption?

The rumor around town all week was that Nick was working at cornerback with the defense during most of his practice time.  I couldn't have been more excited, not only because it would add another "tool" to the Swiss Army Knife's repertoire, but also because if the Ships have a weakness on defense, it is defending the pass.  When I heard the news, I had visions of an Aqib Talib-type Cover-2 corner: big, physical, and only having to deal with a 15x30 box in zone Cover-2.  It was a revelation - Nick's perfect for that kind of thing and a Cover-2 would give passing teams fits.  So I went to Wissports to check De Pere's season stats and saw that the Redbirds were throwing the ball 13 times a game!  Looked like we might see that Cover-2 package.

Nope.  Despite the Redbirds making what must have been a season-high 45 pass attempts, the base defense didn't change at all during the game - Cover 3 with allowances for trips and/or 5 WR packages from De Pere.  Oh well.  Maybe they're putting it in for the playoffs!

In any event, Nick saw some action at wide receiver and did what everyone else on the team did: he dropped one of Tanner's passes!  Nick, I'm sure your parents have already asked you this, but: if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump off too?  Exactly.  You didn't have to drop that pass just to fit in with everyone else.  Be a leader and catch that pass next time!

Happy Birthday Nick

Two first downs on the final drive?  Pffft!  How about two moms!

YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH BUDDY!   Waaaaaa-hoooooo!  Everyone in my section was excited for the shotgun, 4 wide set that the Ships ran on that final drive.  I think I heard more "It's about time they abandon that stupid Wing-T" and "Someone told them it's 2011!"'s than I would have guessed.  I was just excited to see Nick on the field (I can't believe that one of the 10 best athletes on the team rarely plays - that's just criminal).  And then he came up with two huge 1st downs!  And a really heady drop!  Too.  Good.  What a nice early 17th birthday present.

Powder Puff Action

She lost the battle but won the war: Paige = Homecoming Queen.  I'll Krump to that!

Exciting action at Ron Rubick Municipal Field Wednesday night!  The junior powder puff squad upset the senior class for the first time in recent memory.  We'll blog that game over at Title IX by tomorrow night and provide a link to it here.  However, since the game prominently featured Nick and Jonah (as coaches for the victorious junior squad), and Paige, First Lady of one of our Men and your 2011 Lincoln Homecoming Queen, we had to put something related to the game on this blog.  Congrats to all the junior ladies for kicking some senior ass, and to Paige for taking it all so well.

------------------UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!!------------------

Click HERE for the whole story.

 Click "Read more" for other versions of the above pic.

Waiting His Turn

Our Hero didn't play a lot at the beginning of the game.  He held like a champ in the kicking game, and blocked on two kickoff returns, but otherwise was absent until the second half.  We still love him, though, and nothing is more exciting than a 3rd and 8 in mop-up duty.

Just in case he gets in.

Soooooo focused on that ball.

Fast-forward to the second half, when our hero lined up under center.

"Holy Holy Holy!  I get to throw a pass!"

"I threw a pass!  Wassup now?  Slant pattern.  Wasn't caught, but had that been Megatron, it was a completion all the way."

Hey, Paige, Nick just threw a pass!  How does that make you feel?

Click on photo to animate.

But that's not all Nick did:

A run!  He gets to run, too!  But it doesn't look like he's getting many yards.  I wonder why not...

That's right.  The only way to tackle him is to cheat.  Facemask.  So obvious that there are 3 flags there.

Don't worry, Paige.  He's alright.  Have some fun.

Click on photo to animate.

Giving the People What They Wanted

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH Buddy!  You want touchdowns?  He'll give you touchdowns.  And a little something extra just for showin' up...

But first things first:  has anyone ever looked better in warmups?

"What'dju say?"

So. Darn. Cool.

Torque.

He wasn't done.  Nope.  Warmups were just the beginning.  He was blocking on kickoffs:

Well, maybe "blocking" isn't the right word.

Returning post-safety punts:

It's mine, Pistol.  Get your own!

Jonah - the idea is to be in front of Nick.  You know, so you can block someone?

Our hero also continued to hold like a champ:

"This is too easy."

And gossip about his sister:

"Really?  She wore black with brown?  That's RIDICULOUS!"

But then, he took his rightful place behind Jonah:

"Still working out, I see."

"Every day I'm Wagglin'"

TOUCHDOWN!!!!!!

But the coaches had enough.  After going up 51-0, there was only one thing they let Nick work on:

Playfake, snitches.

Parents' Night

I'd be remiss if I didn't pay tribute to the parents who raised our two and a half men...

Hey, Jonah - don't look so happy!  C'mon, man.  You'll have plenty of time to bust playas up soon...

See - look at Nick.  That's how's it's done.  Everybody's happy here...

Derek: "What is your mother doing?"  Austin: "I'm not even gonna look"

Austin:  "Wait, Dad, NO!  He's gonna put that on his blog!"

Susie:  "Blog?  SIGN ME UP!"

Swiss Army Knife

Our Hero added "Kick Returner" to his resume and resumed his punting duties.  He also displayed excellent holding skills (h/t: Jonah) during this one.  But the masses wanted more: a run, a catch, or even some mop-up duty.  It wasn't to be, though.  Not this week.

When I walk on by...

Gary the referee likes Nick's form on this one.

Just look at that.  He can kick.  He can hold.

And he can catch kickoffs!  I love his expression, too.  It' like he's daring them to tackle him.

Hmmmm.  Maybe that whole "I dare you to tackle me" thing wasn't a good idea.

It looks like Ace the referee liked something about that return, at least.

Conference Update

The Short Order Cook:  "This is what we're making the rest of the conference do."

Nick: "Naw, J.  It's more like this.  What do you think, Austin?"

Austin:  "You guys are idiots."

Where the Heck is Nick?

It took a long time for our Hero to get in the game.  But when he finally got in the game, Homer couldn't have written better epic poetry.

No, Nick.  Abercrombie & Fitch does not need any more male models.

"Hey-aaahhh Coach.  You want me to go in?  No?  You sure?"

"Seriously, guys.  I can go in.  I warmed up and everything."

"YEAAAAH BOYIE!  I'm in.  Gimmie the ball."

When I saw Nick finally get in the game with about two or three minutes left in the half, I knew something special was about to happen:

Yeah!  Handoff to Nick!  He's great at running the ball!  Sweet!

Wait.  What the hell is that?  Nick - they put you in at running back, not quarterback!

Wait - is that "Goes Both Ways" Steimle streaking down the field uncovered?  It is!  It is!

Our staff photographer was too busy jumping around like an excited little girl at Christmas to get a good shot of Goes Both Ways' catch.  But take it from me - a better rainbow you've never seen drop into a tight end's bread basket.  TD all the way.  Congratulations to Nick on his first Varsity TD in non-mop-up duty time. 

After 37 points in the first half, though, our hero entered the game as quarterback for mop-up duty in the second half.

"Jonah - you been workin' out?  Firm, yet supple."

But in true epic poetry fashion, our hero fell from grace:

Even though Nick had less time to throw than it took for me to accept a ticket to Thursday's Packers game, he shoulda known not to throw this.  Oh well, he just doubled Lincoln's turnovers on the year.

Coach J: "Seriously, don't ever do that again."